It all started after one too many cups of coffee on a stressful day.
I was home alone with my kids while my wife was with her friends when all of a sudden I felt this intense fear and panic as my heart started racing. My hands were trembling. I felt like I was going to explode from the buzzing. I started to think I was losing my mind and that only made the panic worse. I paced back and forth in my living room and asked my oldest daughter to keep her siblings downstairs and watch them for me.
I called my wife crying and told her to come home because I was for sure dying. I thought I was having a heart attack.
I don’t know why I didn’t go to the hospital until a week later. Maybe I didn’t want to admit something was wrong, or maybe I was too afraid. Either way, I spent the first week dealing with intense fear and not being able to sleep. After a week of things not getting better I called the clinic crying and asked them to please get me in that same day, I told them I was afraid it was my heart. 3 hours later I was in the clinic getting checked out by one of the doctors. Sure enough, my heart was fine. The doctor said what I had was a panic attack and that I’m suffering from anxiety. She prescribed me some medicine and sent me on my way.
No judgment against ANYONE who takes anti-anxiety medicine. Everyone’s path is different. And for some people, medicine is their way. But for me, it wasn’t an option. I was so shocked at how quickly they prescribed the medicine and sent me on my way. No blood work, no other health checks, nothing. Just an “oh you have anxiety, here are some pills, and maybe try to work out.” No lifestyle talk, no nutrition questions, no ways to relieve stress. I was shocked.
I didn’t want to cover up the symptoms, I wanted to get to the root of the problem.
I found an amazing natural clinic by my house and scheduled an appointment right away. I met Dr. C. and he talked me through what was happening and why.
Back in the day if a tiger was chasing you, your fight or flight response would kick in to help you survive. Well now there is no tiger, and it’s still being activated. We set out a plan to get to the bottom of what was happening. I had my blood work done, started taking some essential 12 supplements and amino acids, and patiently waited for the results to come back.
A week later my results came back and I had several things off. My vitamin D was critically low, my antibodies were double what they should be, my iron storage was low, and my cholesterol was not in the optimal range. In addition to that, I did a pee test to check for heavy metal toxicity, hello high levels of lead, and low levels of lithium.
It’s been several months since I started working with Dr. C. In the meantime, I’ve read so many books, listened to so many audios, and have found support from so many different people. He has also recommended me some cannabis-based products for the times when I can feel panic taking over. Due to my lack of knowledge in the field, I might have to first do some research online (on pages like https://buymyweedonline.com/product/thc-live-diamonds-superior-extracts/) to find out about different products and their uses, but it is an interesting option, nonetheless.
One of the secrets to overcoming anxiety is to not hide. Hiding keeps you in shame, which only makes the anxiety worse. From day one I talked to family and friends and as scared as I was admitting what was going on, I realized how supported I was, and that made dealing with it easier.
It’s perfectly normal to ask yourself “am I going crazy” as you deal with anxiety. YOU ARE NOT.
It’s perfectly normal to wonder “will this ever end?” IT WILL!
It’s perfectly normal to take 1 step forward and 2 steps back. PROGRESS IS PROGRESS.
You are not alone in your struggles with anxiety. Let me repeat that, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
I found this amazing workbook and I want to share it with EVERY single person dealing with anxiety. It has tremendously helped me in my healing journey. And that’s what healing from anxiety is, a journey. The things that led to anxiety didn’t happen overnight, so we can’t expect healing to happen overnight. But with patience, time, and some self-care you too can be anxiety-free.
I bought Overthrowing Anxiety by Christian Goodman. And I can’t say enough good things about it. It helped me see how normal I am in my anxiety and my responses to what I’m going thru. If you are really ready to break free from anxiety I highly recommend you check it out here.
Remember, you are not alone.
I’m here for you. I believe in you. I know you will overcome this.
Together we are stronger!